Rigel (n) : awesomesaucery

I'm more than a little bit in love with Eth right now, as she sent me THE BEST PRESENT EVAR! Consisting of a box full of Mills & Boons, and they are utterly delicious - for how can you not be intrigued by a title like this:

The Millionaire's Seductive Revenge

(Although it has to be said that 'The Sheik's Contract Bride' promises lulz, and possibly slave/master type scenarios...)

( epic misogyny is epic )

Oh Kayt, you have impeccable taste!

I mean this was so bad, it transcended pretty much everything in my library - and that takes something pretty special.

I'm just... I have no words for the truly horrific romance this was *needs brain bleach*

Brilliant! (Oh and the crystally futuristic one is shaping up to be something special too! Stay tuned...)




[Poll #1017060]

( It's only a model! )

( Didn't mean to? You put your sword right through his head! )

( There are some who call me... Tim. )

( What... is your quest? )

( Bad, bad Zoot! She has been setting a light to our beacon, which, I've just remembered, is Grail shaped. )

( What's wrong with her? She's beautiful, she's rich, she's got huge... tracts of land. )

( Yes, brave Sir Robin turned about, and valiantly, he chickened out. )

( I have no quarrel with you, good Sir Knight. But I must cross this bridge. )

( And after the spanking, the oral sex! )

A++ I would lol again!

Another Romance Review

You didn't think I'd forgotten did you?

I promised the Duke who needs to learn that dirt smells like perfume and I deliver!

"Something Wonderful" is another classic from my top shelf of romance (aka read literally to pieces) and by the same author as my alltime fave "Whitney, My Love"

Mcnaught always delivers. Melodrama, schmoop and more schmoop. What's not to love?

[Poll #970722]

If you ticked any of the above, well you're in for a treat!

( It's a man, baby! )

( more names than you can poke a stick at )

( I think I broke the Mary-Sue Litmus Test )

( A Knight in shining armor )

( Woe! Why did he have to die and leave me!!!11! )

( Glorious Alex )

( I object! You can't marry my wife because she's married to me! )

It's my favourite day of the month cos sg1_debrief's full newsletter comes out and I can spend the whole day reading and commenting on fic - huzzah! (*ignores work that I should be doing* bah! Porn is waaaaay more important!)

Julie - splash_the_cat is an absolute saint for putting it all together!

So onto another favourite from my "other" shelf :D

SPACE PIRATES!

In honour of the spacepirate_fic ficathon (go read the stories!) and annerbhp's b'day ('cos spacepirates are cool and are way better than ninjas!)

You might want to make sure you're not drinking any hot liquids before you click this reveal :P

( If only my leather pants didn't chafe so bad... )

Obviously this is a book that promises piratey delight!

( Space Pirates want to kidnap my daughter! )

( Call me Captain... my captain )

( Lasers go pew pew )

( Khaaaaaaaaan! )

And in related news, my romance book newsletter arrived today full of snippets of upcoming books etc. I was particularly taken by one set in the Paranormal Romance section under the Vampire(!) heading.

Tis a series (The Dark Lover series by JR Ward) - but get a load of the names of the heroes:

Wrath, Rhage, Zsadist, Phury, Vishous and Tohrment

*g* GOLD!! It's like some bogan mother went to town naming her offspring! *is sorely tempted to shell out the $15.95 for at least one*

*pulls out the big guns*

Two words.

BARBARIAN PLANET

Oh yes... I bring you the quality "futuristic space romance"

This book, *pets it lovingly* has everything!

( It is I Fabio, the most beautiful man in the cosmos - including the black holes! )

The cover alone is worth the price of admission!

( Being a virgin = illegal )

( Me Warrior *grunt* You Woman *lewd grunt* )

( Take me swiftly, my barbarian hunk o' burning man-love )

( Spank me harder, yes... yeeeeeeeeeeees!!! )

( ZOMG! What do you mean I have to give birth? )

Ahh Johanna Lindsay, you never fail to bring the WTFery back into romance novels...

Time for another "classic" from my collection!

This, dear friends, is the very first romance book I ever read. It made a rather remarkable impression on my tender 12 year old mind and ever since I have harbored a passion to marry a titled man, so that I too can be addressed as "your Grace."

I have to confess - I LOVE THIS BOOK. Love it, read it once a year at least - but I can admit it has flaws - oh yes... dubious... very dubious...

( Firstly the Cover! Is there manboob? )

Yes! you too are enthralled by such a cover and can't wait to dive in to experience the promised awesome!

( Our Heroine: Hoyden, High Spirited, Scandal-Waiting-To-Happen - SEND HER TO FRANCE! )

( He came to a masquerade dressed as the devil himself, how very appropriate! )

( What do you mean you sold me? )

( OMGWTFBBQ... I didn't just read that )

The melodrama!! *dies from it*

Next up: "Something Wonderful" by the same author aka "Mary Wonder-Sue and the Duke who needs to understand the meaning behind the 'smell of dirt'"

Ahhhh Trashy Historical Romance!

How I love thee! I'm sure most of you know by now that I'm an avid reader of said genre, and am always on the lookout for anything that looks horrifically bad to add to my collection of "I can't believe they wrote that"

I have quite a collection of the dubious sex slave/harem themed novels (they almost guarantee the bad!) And perusing the second hand store last week I found this gem!



( The Blurb That Sucked Me In )

Pirates! Dubious Harem/sex slave storyline!, lost daughter who instantly knows her daddy after one look at him!, flashback sex scenes! What more could you want.

( Our Heroine )

( Our Dashing Hero )

( Let's See The Stats )

( What you want more cliches? )

( Verdict? )